Chilean Men

We are trying a little something new and are doing a group blogging session on one topic. This week we’re writing about Chilean men. Here is a list of links of those who have participated so far — leave me a comment if you already posted and I haven’t put your link up yet! I’m not reading these until I write my own post as I don’t want to be influenced by what everybody else has to say! I’d rather wait to see if we have similar or very differing opinions on the subject. Oh, and anyone who has anything to say about Chilean men or foreign men in general is welcome to participate.

*Edited to add — So far I think everyone who has commented has been updated on this list. So read away and let’s talk. I have LOVED all these great posts. Everybody took a different angle, but everybody hit the nail on the head. And some of the entries have been absolutely hilarious!

Chilean men. Ahhhh, Chilean men. They are the reason nearly every woman I am close with is in this country. Just last night I saw a blip on the news about a French woman who came to Santiago as a performer in Cirque du Soleil. A group of Chilean was doing a backstage tour and one of them took the time to introduce himself to her. This woman was still in costume and he called her “La payasita mas bella que he visto,” or the most beautiful clown he’s ever seen. She fell in love in that one second. She stayed. They lived happily ever after. The end.

That seems to be a frequent scenario with Chilean men. They are a special breed of the opposite sex — in general, much less handsome than the Argentines, way worse dancers than the Venezuelans or Brazilians, not as talented at smooth talking as the Venezuelans* — yet, so incredibly good at making women fall in love with them.

I’m not just talking about making gringas fall in love with them either. These men know how to get women of any nationality to fall under their charm. Chilenas are just as susceptible as foreigners. It’s not just the sweet broken English that gets the ladies swooning. Even their mother’s are madly in love with them, and I mean MADLY in love! It’s actually kind of creepy sometimes, but in a sweet way. The term “Mama’s boy,” doesn’t even begin to describe the relationship that most guys here I know have with their madres.

Dating a Chilean man, in my personal experience, was sheer heaven compared to going out with American men. Maybe that’s because S. is the guy for me and behaved as such from the beginning — or maybe it’s because Chilean men truly know how to treat their significant other — I’ll (hopefully) never know. This strange breed of man, with his mullet and his fanny pack, will soon have you overlooking fashion blunders as he hangs on to your every word, treats you with respect, and opens up to you about his *GASP* feelings.

As anyone who knows S. in the real life has probably realized, he’s not a man of many words. In fact, when a friend who knows he’s a big dog person wondered why he didn’t seem more excited when talking about Papito, obviously the answer is — he can barely show his love for me in public — how would he be able to admit he has a soft spot for a dog to someone he doesn’t know very well? Yet, although S. and I are not the mushy gushy type by a looooong stretch, he doesn’t mince words if he wants to tell me he appreciates me and loves me. If we have a problem he’s happy to communicate about his feelings in a way that no man in the States I know ever has or ever will do.

Unlike some gringo guys, he doesn’t think that putting actual planning/effort/sentiment into a relationship makes him less of a man. He’s happy anytime I’m happy. And from what I hear, all Chileans, or at least all Chileans worth keeping a gringa in Chile for, are like that.

Yes, of course there are certain bad qualities that I’ve heard Chilean men have. Some are known to be extremely machista — although I think this is a dying trend, as all the gringas I know are with very progressive men, who are in many cases, like mine, even quite a bit feminist. And then there are the men who catcall. For me piropos are literally the one thing that if eradicated would make living permanently in this country a possibility. But, the fact that not a single day (in which I leave my house, of course) can pass without some old wrinkly jackass who farts dust hissing, “M’hijita rica, ssssssss,” in my ear like the biggest fucking creep in the entire world, makes me want to strap a backpack with all my things on it and walk to Antartica where I’ll live in an igloo and only leave if the penguins promise not to harass. Again, also like the machista thing, I think this may be generational, as it really does seem to be either very old men, or else younger guys trying to act cool.  It’s rare that I’ll walk by a university and a dude will say something truly disgusting.

If there’s one thing I love about this country, you could definitely say it’s the men. Although, maybe I should change that to “the man,” since I only have experience with one specific Chilean (after going through hell and back, I was on a bit of a man ban before I met S. I wanted nothing to do with anyone with a penis). But anyways, I married that one specific Chilean so I guess you could say that actions speak louder than anything else I could type in this post.

*Yes, I realize these things do not pertain to every single Chilean — some are very handsome (my husband, and all of my friends’ husbands and boyfriends) some are brilliant dancers (definitely not my husband) and some are great smooth talkers (again, not S.). That’s why I said, in general.

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Comments

  1. mountaingazer says:

    Thanks for describing my brotherhood so well. Claudio

  2. Ordinary Girl says:

    I wanted to write a post to participate, but I only dated one foreign man and it felt a little weird writing about an ex-boyfriend on a blog my in-laws read. So, next time I hope to write something. I really love the idea. :)

  3. Emily says:

    Mine’s up! I don’t know what it is about these guys, but they do seem to have a certain something that we foreign women find madly attractive.

  4. Mamacita Chilena says:

    Claudio, you guys are certainly a very special breed. :)

    O.G. any suggestions for the next topic???

    Emily, you’re added!

  5. TD says:

    So what you are saying is I have to move to Chile to find a good man!?!?!? :) Guess Georgia just ain’t cuttin it!

  6. Leigh says:

    Mine’s up, too!

    I totally agree that Chilean men are more open about their feelings…Well, not all of them, but a good deal of ‘em. I melt whenever a guy starts waxing poetic about his parents or talks about how standing by the ocean makes him feel. It’s funny, because everyone assumes Latin men are so concerned with being macho. It’s hard for me to imagine a gringo professing his feelings so eloquently!

  7. Shannon says:

    I just finished my post.
    btw I googled Chilean wedding traditions and your blog came up, after i read your story, which was amazing! I was looking at a link you had on one of your posts the left/right side of the brain test, I see the girl going counter clockwise. But she switches over after a few minutes!! I can’t wait to start reading other people’s posts on Chilean men! Have a good weekend!

  8. Clare says:

    I wanna be on the list!! I already have mine up– and I link to everyone.

  9. Clare says:

    Also, I too left the others to reading until afterwards. Good call. But I would also add that in the dating front you hit the lottery. I have dated multiple chileans over the years and my S is the only one I would have remotely considered dating and he is so very non-chilean in some ways.

  10. Clare says:

    I put suggestions up in an earlier post, but they included favorite vacation spot from Chile, and favorite place to go out/ eat in Chile.

  11. Meredith says:
  12. lydia says:

    hey. Long story short I found this through daves esl cafe (and then a few clicks through blogger world). anyway, i got sick in bed today and managed a post of my own. regardless, small world. i know a few people who you know or are at least acquainted with online.

    http://pintadegringa.blogspot.com/2008/08/my-generalizations-about-chilean-men.html

  13. lydia says:

    oops. i got STUCK sick in bed. anyway, someone who read my post just send me this link

    http://www.amazon.com/T-Shirt-Woman-White-Chilean-Country/dp/B000EDDID4

  14. Jessica says:

    mine´s up… it´s on the cheesy side i guess, but eh.. whatever. :) i like the new font, btw!

  15. Maeskizzle says:

    Dude, your blog takes longer to “materialize” lately. What up? Like when I click on it, it takes a while for the page to show up.

    Anyway, I posted on Chilenos and I liked your idea of blogging about Chilean women (you mentioned on Leigh’s blog). That would actually be a suitable topic since we’ve just blogged about men.

  16. Mamacita Chilena says:

    TD, yep, you want one, come down and get him :)

    Leigh, just like everything else in this country it’s a contradiction — latin macho men who aren’t afraid to show their softer side.

    Shannon, isn’t that test so weird?!?

    Clare, well, you had to pick through a few losers to get to him, but at least you finally found him…or should I say, you just stopped looking since you knew him from the get go?

    Also, I like the favorite vacation spot idea!

    Lydia, cool, so glad you found me and joined in! I have never heard of Dave’s ESL cafe. Who else could be our common denominator? Also, do you live in Santiago?

    Jessica, thanks, glad you like it! Cheesy is good sometimes, I enjoyed your post :)

    Heather…loading slower? Weird. It’s loading fine for me so can anybody else who passes this way tell me if the page isn’t loading right for you either?

  17. lydia says:

    It unrelated, but Dave’s ESL cafe is basically resources for teaching english abroad. Through their forums, I found info on chile meetups via blogger, which as i’m sure youv’e noticed a ton of expats are intertwined on here…hence clicking around came upon yours and some others who are posting. Of your list above, I also know Tyffanie and Meredith through other means.

  18. Fned says:

    Ooh, This looks like a fun project… can’t wait to read ALL the different perspectives on Chilean men… lol

    Wish I could participate and do a post on French Men… but I could only honestly write about a French mAn and he’s not anything like the rest of French mEn (maybe that’s why I like him so much) so it wouldn’t be exactly fair…

    Still, can’t wait to hear about the next “Group Blog”!! =)

    Fned.

  19. Girl.Meets.Chile says:

    mine’s up too!!! CHilean women would be a great next topic! (We just HAVE to include Rachels old post about it..he he)

  20. Anonymous says:

    Hello. Im not sure if my following quetion would be appropriate to be posted here or no…but let me hear about your opinions. I recently have a crush on one chilian man who works in the same company (live in north america). I only see him a few times a week because of working in a diffeent department. we never have any conversation so far but I feel he also pays attention to me. What I know about him is only that he grew up in Chili and graduated from the university in US. I want to talk with him…. though some people says on web,”women aren’t surpposed to ask guys out under chilian custom”. Should not I even make a smile at him to give him a sign of my feeling…?? Then, what should I do!?? Im a,quite shy, japanese woman. I would be gald if anyone would give me advice.

  21. Mamacita Chilena says:

    Hi anonymous, maybe if he lives in the U.S. he’s been Americanized a little…but either way I doubt he’d mind if you asked him out :)

  22. Cristián says:

    very interesting blog you have here. I have a few gringa friends and curiously enough they are all engaged to chileans. I wondered why… and you give some explanation on that. I don’t really know if we are all the way you describe us, but definetely those relationships are on increase. But whatever the reason, gringas are most welcome here. just drop by and have fun. prices are cheap, there’s a lot of good wine and a bunch of chileans to hang around with haha
    just don’t keep around Providencia, for there are many middle-class spots to get a good grasp of local culture. saludos y felicitaciones por el blog

  23. Anonymous says:

    ** IMPORTANT FEEDBACK ** Being an Australian Chilean (a chilean born in chile who grew up in Australia) I feel there is a lot of misconceptions out there..
    Firstly, chilean really don’t want to spend their lives with a “gringa” they just want to have a sexual relationship with her (from experience). Chilean men don’t really have a liking of their ways just their different looks (try a blonde).

    I have a friend from chile who just arrived in australia about a year ago. He is happy with his chilean-australian girlfriend but wants to try a “gringa” in the same way someone wants to drive a different model car.

    We chilean men can never really be happy with a “gringa” because they are generally as dry and critically indifferent as their male counterparts. “gringa” women are generally better at grabbing our attention (being blonde helps) but don’t understand us in the long term. White women are as cool to “hang out with” as a dry leaf branch in death valley.

    You are some disillusioned ladies out there..

  24. gonzalo says:

    I’m sure Anonymous is the kind of Chilean guy that wouldn’t shave or have a haircut in a whole year, probably unable to even keep a decent job, but dreaming of foreign women ready to hang out with him.
    There were a lot of Chileans moving to Australia and Sweden after the political issues started here, and were not exactly the kind of people you’d welcome in your neighborhood. Those are the same living of welfare for life, not making any effort to learn the language, find a job, make a career, or treat women like a gentleman.

    American women I’ve met are educated, informed, pragmatic, and have a beautiful complexion because the U.S. have more ethnic variety than Chile, so they’re always attactive and exotic to me, regardless of her ethnicity.
    Most of them are healthy -would do sports, go to the gym, etc., which I love because I also like sports, while most chilenas are as active as sleeping cows.

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