Fotografo de Bodas, Santiago

October 8, 2009

Ok, so the longer we’re here, the more I realize that while I definitely like vacationing here, Seba was right — there’s too much that’s like the parts of Chile that we’re not crazy about. The problem is that I go into every country looking at it as a potential place for us to settle down. So all the little annoyances that I would normally overlook like a regular tourist — the shiteous transportation system or the way everyone cuts in line all the time –make me realize that I definitely could not deal with this place under long term circumstances. That being said Cinque Terre was on of my favorite expeditions that we’ve done this whole trip. And god help me, I LOVE these crazy Italians. But if another man reeking of B.O. looks at me, looks at the line, and then pushes his way in front of me, I will tackle him like a linebacker, throw him in the shower — and it will NOT be sexual. I will scrub him down with a pumice stone til he bleeds teaching him to STOP CUTTING in line and STOP STINKING UP PUBLIC SPACES. Yes, I have violent fantasies sometimes. Aside from that the Italians have been nothing but friendly and hysterical and totally awesome.

Take the stereotype about Italians talking with their hands, for instance. It’s so true! We were on a bus in Florence the other day when a woman walked up to the driver, from what I gathered, angry because he had passed her stop. They got into a huge argument, yelling at each other at the top of their lungs. The driver got so worked up that he started talking with his hands — both of them. In my head I was all, “Stop being Italian and start driving!!! THIS THING HAS NO CO-PILOT!!!” It was a scary moment for me.

People have been so friendly though, that while I can certainly rule it out as a place to live, unlike Seba I cannot truly dislike Italy. In all the towns we’ve been in, it seems that tourism is the prime industry. And so, the Italians don’t seem in the least bit pissed that there are ten gazillion exchange students getting drunk off Chianti and old people tourists that don’t even make an attemt to speak Italian and bitch about the courses of their meal not being served in the same order as at home.

A few other fun facts about Italy, while we’re on the subject — HUGE naked pictures of Victoria Beckham and David Beckham re everywhere. I’m actually leaning on Posh’s flat abs and staring at Mr. Posh’s giant package directly in front of me at the train station as we speak, where I’m sitting typing this blog post on my iTouch.

Other random fact — there are scales, as in, find out how much weight you’ve gained while on vacation, scales, all over the streets. And one of the restaurants we ate at had rucola translated as rocket. I don’t blame them — it’s a hard word and I actually paused after writing it wondering if it was correct. But it brought me to tears over my pasta dinner laughing as I thought about “Rocket salad” and a “piglet meat sauce with rocket and cream.”

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12 Comments

Envisioning you scrubbing down the stinky Italian in the shower cracked me up. Believe it or not, “rocket” is not a bad translation of rucola. The Brits use the term “rocket” instead of arugula. If you ask me, “piglet meat sauce” could use a little improvement in the translation department. lol As far as the scales, run away, as fast as you possibly can. That is just evil.

Comment by Katie — October 8, 2009 @ 6:44 am

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Damn, Katie beat me to it. I remember another gringa blogger laughing at a Chilean restaurant's translation of rucula and explaining that it actually really is rocket in the UK, so you're not alone in your amusement. As to where the Brits got rocket, I have no clue.

I had to laugh at your fantasies of cleaning Italian men and description of the bus driver – so Italian!

Comment by emilyinchile — October 8, 2009 @ 8:06 am

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You're right. Italy definitely had a very Chilean feel to some parts of it, but despite all the bad parts, I loved Rome. The transport could kind of suck. But, I loved the history and the culture. Plus, the city was relatively small so you could walk around if you want and avoid all the smelly people and line cutters.

Comment by Sara — October 8, 2009 @ 9:41 am

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Haha, in Italy I walked by a couple of people, moving their hands, and to me it seemed that they were yelling. I asked, “Why are they yelling” and it was explained to me that they were just having a friendly conversation.

It explains a lot about my own mother's violent gestures and voice modulation problem….

Comment by amanda — October 8, 2009 @ 6:48 pm

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By they way… I was in Italy in the summer and didn't notice any BO. Hmm. I wonder if things are different in Rome. Transportation was kinda a problem, but they can't exactly have an extensive metro line when there are ruins under everything. They had a nice train though. But I think that maybe if you had been in a more cosmopolitan area it might have been a little better.

Italy did not remind me of Chile all that much. I actually felt like they were rather different. I felt like in Italy there was more of an old world feel with more attention to the finer details of life. Of course, I see everything in terms of food. So Italy = good food, Chile = bad food, that simple.

Comment by amanda — October 8, 2009 @ 6:51 pm

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Oh I missed the last paragraph…arugula is called Rocket in the UK, they translate it like that in Chile, too.

Really though, the more I read about your experience in Italy the more I think you should have gone to Rome. I felt like Rome was filled with “high culture” — high fashion, high quality old-world products, food, etc. The whole place just teems with sophistication. Perhaps you just selected kind of small places. If someone were to visit my home town in the US and then go and say, “the US is boring” I'd be like, well have you been to NYC? I think it's kind of hard to compare.

Wow, I didn't think I'd be so defensive of Italy, haha, it's just one of my favorite places, but I spent nearly all my time in Rome.

Comment by amanda — October 8, 2009 @ 6:57 pm

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Rocket as in the peppery salad leaves? Like dandelion leaves? Yup, rocket sauce, great on chicken or fish.

Comment by elizaclaire — October 9, 2009 @ 3:56 pm

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Kyle I love reading all of your posts! Glad you guys are having a good time on your trip.

Just a random note, in Australia rocket is what arugula (or rucola they are the same) is called! It comes on everything, rocket and steak sandwich, rocket salad, rocket on top of pizzas etc so maybe they have a lot of Australian tourists? Anyways it is hilarious but I love calling it that! Go rocket

Comment by thornton12 — October 10, 2009 @ 7:10 am

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It's not the there are a lot of Australians in Italy: if any they will be recognized as north americans. It's because in Australia there are a LOT of italians and from what many friends told me they thought australians how to eat. Not only the italians started to produce real italian food in Australia….

Comment by astrosimo — November 1, 2009 @ 7:20 pm

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I would like you to admit that (althaught you don't like the word rocket for rucola) at least you find a place where they tried to translate it. In Italy we are used to learn the “oxford english” this is why we make… mistakes.
In the past you would hardly find a place with traslation of the menu.

Comment by astrosimo — November 1, 2009 @ 7:24 pm

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It's not the there are a lot of Australians in Italy: if any they will be recognized as north americans. It's because in Australia there are a LOT of italians and from what many friends told me they thought australians how to eat. Not only the italians started to produce real italian food in Australia….

Comment by astrosimo — November 2, 2009 @ 3:20 am

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I would like you to admit that (althaught you don't like the word rocket for rucola) at least you find a place where they tried to translate it. In Italy we are used to learn the “oxford english” this is why we make… mistakes.
In the past you would hardly find a place with traslation of the menu.

Comment by astrosimo — November 2, 2009 @ 3:24 am

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