Fotografo de Bodas, Santiago

December 22, 2009

My name has always been a thing of confusion, both in the U.S. and in Chile. In the U.S. people expect a boy and then when I show up, they’re all confused. I get “Kyla,” or “Kylie,” a lot, or other variations that sound more feminine to normal people’s ears.

In Chile, there’s no gender associated with Kyle. However, in the Spanish language, the sounds in my name aren’t common. To get people to even come close to understanding me, I have to pronounce my own name wrong — in an accent that a Chilean ear can better pick up.

The other day, Seba and I were out looking at apartments and when we went in I asked the doorman to call up to the apartment we were visiting for us. He said, “De parte de quien,” or “Who shall I say is calling?”

I respond, obviously, “Kyle Hepp.”

He stares.

I stare back.

He says, “uuuh.”

I repeat my name in an even more pronounced Chilean version this time, “mi nombre es Kyle Hepp.”

He asks, “Como?”

I say, “Please tell her that la Senora Kyle Hepp, from Portalinmobiliario, is here.”

He says, “I’m sorry, can you repeat your name one more time?”

KYLE HEPP. At this point I sound like one of those programs that helps kids with speech impediments, where the voice OV-ER EN-UN-CIATES EV-ERY-THING.

Then…

He asks me in English,

“Uh Miss,(pronounced Meeeeeeees) what your name?”

To give him due credit, he is a doorman with probably little education so the fact that he’s competent enough to string together a coherent sentence in a second language is reasonably impressive.

But, I just don’t follow the rationale here. At various points in our conversation, even if he didn’t understand my actual name, he knew that I understood the questions being asked because I was RESPONDING TO THEM. Did he think I was saying my name wrong? I mean, why would asking me in English get him a different answer than asking me in Spanish — would my name change?

Did he really think he was going to get a different answer if he asked me for my name in a different language?!? Next time, let’s try Chinese and see if that works.

These are the kinds of frustrations that make me glad I have a blog where I can vent.

And we did finally get up to see the apartment. It was a piece of poop. Definitely not worth five minutes of my life it took to try and make the doorman understand Kyle Hepp.

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hahaha You have no idea how much I identify with this post. I hate telling people my name here in Argentina because 1) I always have to repeat myself at least once and 2) they always respond with “¡Qué nombre raro!” or some such. Thank God my name's not Sheniqua, although maybe that would be easier for them to pronounce…

Comment by Katie — December 23, 2009 @ 5:20 am
TOO funny.

Of course you know that my favorite is when I spell my name for people, and they decide to add an “n” at the end. First of all Emilyn is not a name I have EVER heard, so it's not as though it's more common than Emily, and secondly I don't understand that people assume I do not know how to spell my own name. I stopped after the “y” because there are no more letters, not because I forgot the last letter!

Comment by emilyinchile — December 23, 2009 @ 6:02 am
This is exactly why I was so glad my name has a close Spanish equivalent that I could use when people were having troubles pronouncing it!

Comment by Caitlan — December 23, 2009 @ 8:00 am
lol luckily who would have thought that Kyle would be a confusing name!

Comment by amandabasteen — December 23, 2009 @ 12:04 pm
LOL. So funny.

On the other hand, my daughter (Ysella) has a name that gets mispronounced ALL THE TIME in the UK (“Yes-ella” “Wys-ella” etc) and the GP's receptionist (much like your doorman) is convinced I get it wrong, and I'm saying “It's Ella”, even when I spell it for her. Going to Spain is a joy (“Aah, ee-ZELL-ah”) and I imagine that, if Ysella ever visits Chile, she'd find it equally as sympathetic to her name.

Comment by elizaclaire — December 23, 2009 @ 12:36 pm
People never understand me in Australia either. It'll be things like a waiter asking me what I want to drink and I'll say “water” and they will have no idea what I am asking for until Inspector Climate finally cuts in and says “she'll have a water”…

Comment by Decoybetty — December 23, 2009 @ 3:01 pm
My sister Renee, shortly after moving to Colombia and running into trouble with her name there, just started calling herself Elena (after her middle name Ellen) just so she wouldn't have to endure those types of conversations over and over. Elena is something both she and the Colombians can pronounce and understand. But I think that would be hard for me to do. I would not want to change my name for everyone else's convenience.

Comment by Ritamae39 — December 23, 2009 @ 6:08 pm
I feel your pain. I'm going to write a post someday soon about all the names I've invented for myself during my time in Chile.

Comment by leigh — December 23, 2009 @ 7:09 pm
Hillarious!

Comment by shue — December 31, 2009 @ 4:53 am
Hillarious!

Comment by shue — December 31, 2009 @ 12:53 pm