Reverse Culture Shock

May 6, 2010

*I thought I’d be able to go through Amazon photos and post as soon as we got into the U.S. because we ordered a new computer. It was here waiting for us when we arrived at my mom’s house. But we turned it on and the hard drive died instantly. We took it to Apple today and they have to replace the hard drive so at the moment I have no way to even look at the pictures (Seba’s laptop is way too slow)! But they’re coming, I swear. On to the post.

One of the things I find most frustrating about Chile is the lack of choice — in pretty much everything. And one of the things I find positively absurd about the U.S. is the overabundance of choice. See my last post on grocery stores in the States — I find the pop aisles to be paralyzingly overwhelming.

And now, after sitting on a flight to Chicago flipping through a copy of “Sky Mall,’ out of sheer boredom, let me tell that the items for sale were beyond ridiculous. Here’s a sampling:

The World’s Largest Write On Map Mural

The Only Digital Camera Swim Mask

The Only Underwater Pogo Stick*

The (specially shaped in a curve) Front Pocket Wallet

Video Recording Sunglasses

Canine Genealogy Kit

I’ll admit that I’m seriously considering a purchase of the Canine Genealogy Kit for Papito because I’d love to know more about what kind of dog she is.

HOWEVER. Does anyone really need a “Colorful Underwater Light Show For Inside Your Pool or Spa”? I was at the grocery store today and while I absolutely love of having the luxury of an entire aisle full of salad dressings to choose from the excess sort of numbs my brain. In many ways, it’s amazing. I adore going grocery shopping in this country and Seba and I could spend hours doing so if it didn’t make other people impatient. We walk  up and down and marvel at the 20 varieties of parmesan cheese (low fat, low sodium, mixed with other kinds of cheese, shredded, shaved). We buy sauces to take back with us to marinade our chicken in flavors Seba’s family hasn’t tried (lime vinagrette, lemon pepper, honey dijon, Jamaica jerk).

But in the same way that I feel like a family of four shouldn’t need to have four cars, I feel like human beings shouldn’t need to have a choice between regular broccoli and broccolini in the produce department. Broccolini is broccoli with long skinny stems. Then again, maybe it actually tastes better. Who knows. I live in Chile. We don’t have that kind of variety.

*Is it possible to bounce underwater?

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Trip to the Amazon

May 4, 2010

I hadn’t known peace until I’d floated silently down a tributary of the Amazon watching a rainbow form.

I hadn’t known curiosity until I met groups of people living on the edge of the jungle, sleeping in the open air, treating themselves with their own medicine, wearing no shoes, but t-shirts with English slogans.

I hadn’t known the power of Mother Nature until I felt a torrential Amazonian downpour coming down so strong I couldn’t even see two inches in front of my face.

And I hadn’t known pain until I got the world’s most painful stomach ache and thought I was going to poop my pants at the start of a 4 hour boat ride, when our motor broke down in said torrential downpour. FYI, there are no outhouses in the Amazon!

Like I said, our trip the Peruvian Amazon was out of this world incredible. I am already planning on saving my pennies or trying to figure out another way to win a contest and go free again! The whole experience was absolutely beyond anything I could have ever imagined.

I really didn’t have any expectations going in. Anyone who knows me…has traveled with me has met me for more than five minutes has probably realized that planning isn’t my strong point. Seba and I were the weones who showed up to the jungle with no safari hat, who packed tennis shoes, not hiking books, the ones who brought regular off instead of the hardcore stuff with deet bugspray, and the ones who brought no cash on board (with which to tip the crew, buy drinks, buy artesenia from one of the villages we visited) And really, we were lucky this was a luxury boat. We slept in gorgeous cabins with an Amazon-front view, and air conditioning — not mosquito nets. So ridiculously lucky, actually.

I’m running out the door to the airport now to leave for the U.S. (15 minute countdown!) and I still haven’t had a chance to look through all the photos and videos we took. I swear, I’ll really do a full blog post as soon as we get back. For now, here’s another HOLY CRAP I’M IN THE AMAZON picture. Yeah. Pretty sure my face looked like that the entire trip. Also pretty sure that’s Seba’s HOLY CRAP I’M IN THE AMAZON AND MY WIFE IS RIDICULOUS face.

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Trip to the Amazon

May 3, 2010

We’re back. I’m still in awe of just how incredible our trip to the Amazon was. Seriously, if you’ve never been, you MUST GO NOW.

This is my HOLY CRAP I’M IN THE AMAZON FACE:

But right now, I have my HOLY CRAP I’M SO TIRED I’M GOING TO FALL OVER face on. We traveled all night last night, got in at 7:30am, and we’re leaving for the U.S. tomorrow.

I cannot even wait to write about this trip and put the photos up on the blog. As soon as I have a spare second, I’ll do a full post.

And for now, check out the pretty pictures that the super talented Seattle Wedding Photographer, Kip Beelman took of us while he was in Chile! Makeup and hair done by the fabulous Rodrigo Farah, obvio po :) I’m love the pictures! I don’t look fat and Seba doesn’t look angry — two most important factors in any photo shoot where we are the subjects.

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