September 8, 2011
I would like to make an immediate disclaimer — this is NOT written to any one person in particular so do NOT feel like it is. I guarantee I’m going to get emails tomorrow from people thinking I wrote the post about them specifically. No. That is not the case. A lot of people do this, it happens constantly. It’s not just you. I promise. So don’t take it personally.
I live in Chile.
I have lived here for 7 years.
I’ve never been an English teacher. There’s a reason for that.
Wait for it…wait for it….
It’s because I DO. NOT. WANT. to teach English.
You’re probably thinking, ok duh, what does that have to do with anything?
Chileans speak English to me all the time. They see my blond head (which will soon be grey, at the rate I’m going) and it’s like they just can’t help themselves. I know I’m a tempting target for, “Hello! How are you?” But, c’mon. Resist. We live in Santiago.
The people that only interact with me in situations like Starbucks or Falabella get a pass. They are seeing me for the first time and have no idea whether or not I speak Spanish. I now know that it’s not their fault when they assume I don’t before I’ve ever even opened my mouth (it’s their subconscious’ fault). And my friends all know that I speak Spanish, plus, we interact regularly enough that it would seem weird if they suddenly tried to start speaking to me in English. It’s the acquaintances that don’t know me well that always try to speak English to me.
They say things like, “I just want to practice.”
Well that’s great, but you can pay somebody to do that. Again, let me repeat myself, I Do. Not. Want. to teach English. I applied for one job as an English teacher right after we were married because we were tight on money. They offered the position to me and I ended up not taking it once I realized that teaching English would take away my will to live.
Aside from the fact that I don’t have the patience to listen to people who want to practice their English on me, there are a few other reasons I don’t like it when they try.
One, is that many Chileans suffer from extreme embarrassment over trying to speak a foreign language so too many times I’ve heard them say things in English in a weird, over-enthusiastic, joking tone. “Oh YES! Hello, HELLO!” I know they’re clowning around as a way to protect themselves from embarrassment, but when I’m trying to have a normal conversation with a normal person, I want them to be their normal selves.
I also think it’s disrespectful. In the U.S. I would never speak Spanish to a native Spanish speaker (unless they spoke to me in Spanish first) who was trying to speak English to me, no matter how bad their English was. It just seems like if that person has made the effort to learn the language, the least I can do is take the time to listen to them in said language.
But, when I get right down to it, I think the reason goes deeper too.
I have not always had an easy time fitting in here. For right wrong, whether it’s me or whether it’s them, I’ve had a hard time finding my place in Chile. Chileans who will only speak in English to me are highlighting the fact that I’m a foreigner. I don’t need another reason to feel different. I live here. Treat me like it.
So let’s recap. Here’s why you can keep your English to yourself.
1. If you want to practice, pay somebody — and by that I mean, pay somebody else. Not me. Thanks.
2. I don’t like your clown voice. It annoys me.
3. Respect.
4. Stop treating me like a damn outsider. I live here.
I think most Gringas are quite a bit kinder to the English speaking Chileans than I am. To be fair, most people, not just gringas, have far more patience than I do, when it comes to anything and everything. Let it be said that I’ve never been a particularly tolerant person — though I’ve definitely mellowed in my old age. I was way worse in high school. But back to the point at hand. If you live in a foreign country and speak the language fluently, do people still talk to you in English? And if they do, does it bother you?
Or I am just extra crazy?
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September 5, 2011
The post I wrote the other day on Chile’s middle class has kept people talking. I can’t even count how many emails I received on the subject, or how many friends, clients and family members have even brought it up to me in conversation since then.
The thing is, most of them were kind of shocked. They’ve said things to me like, “I can’t believe I’m in the top 10% of highest earning families in Chile. How can that be? We live a normal lifestyle.” Which again, proves my point — that lifestyle is not “normal” to the rest of Chile. It’s normal to the people who live in this world, where we all travel, live in nice neighborhoods, eat out sometimes and maybe have a nana that comes once a week. It doesn’t feel luxurious, but considering that only a small percentage of the population can live that like that, it’s definitely not “normal.”
Which brings me to the protests and the general unrest that’s been going on.
Lately, there’s been a tension in the air. I’m not just talking about the student protests, but in general. It’s the same kind of tension I felt the last time we were in Buenos Aires, when everywhere we went, people were talking about how unhappy they were with the government, with the inflation, with the economy, etc. It felt like an explosion about to happen.
That’s how Chile feels to me right now. There is an unrest. There is a feeling that things MUST change, that we can’t go on the way Chile has gone on in the past. Something’s gotta give.
Emily wrote about the student protests a couple weeks ago. I think she did a really good job summing things up.
While I am not so fully on the side of the protests, simply because I don’t like the violence that always follows them, I agree with the students that the education system needs to be reformed. I definitely do agree with their creative methods for protesting the system — ie, doing a massive Thriller dances in the streets, or running laps around La Moneda, staging a kiss-in, etc.
Now, is free education the solution? Probably not. I really don’t see that working here. Chileans would be completely unwilling to pay the high taxes that a completely free education system would require. However, the playing field needs to be leveled. As it stands now, what they’re doing isn’t working.
That’s why we pay for Marcelo to go to college.
BECAUSE HE NEVER HAD A FAIR SHOT.
He is one story of millions. He comes from a low-income family. He went to the best high school his family could afford, which was a technical school. After that, he started working in construction earning a minimal salary. It wasn’t the worst salary, he was getting by. But he couldn’t save money. He wanted to go to college and he couldn’t because he couldn’t afford to pay for it because he had the kind of job that one here gets after you attend a technical high school. Chile isn’t like the U.S. A construction worker doesn’t make 30 bucks an hour. You can’t wait tables part time and pay for school.
Here, public schools (lower education, I’m talking from kindergarten on up, not just college) are horrendous. The quality of education is so bad that students who go to public high school can’t compete with those who go to private high school. When the students graduate they take an exam called the PSU, which would be similar to the SAT or the ACT test in the U.S. Those who go to private high schools score high enough to attend one of the top three universities, La Catolica, La Chile or La USACH. Everybody else (read: most of the kids who went to public high school where they were poorly prepared for the exam) is left to fend for themselves and take their pick of private universities which are generally both more expensive and lower quality. And then. And THEN. When these kids graduate the inequities don’t stop there. Companies will put job offers in the paper that say, “Looking for a civil engineer from La Catolica or La Chile.” A lot of times they won’t even interview kids that didn’t have the good fortune to attend one of those three schools for undergrad.
And this guy has the nerve to say, “While there will always be people everywhere who want something for nothing, Chileans are quite happy with their economic prospects.”
Something for nothing? SOMETHING FOR NOTHING? That’s what he calls people like Marcelo, who worked his ass off for years in the construction business, every year managing to save, oh $500 bucks, in hopes of being able to attend college 15 years down the road?
Marcelo was super happy with his economic prospects — that’s why he was doing that.
The thousands of kids who were protesting want something for nothing, that’s why they were out marching the streets.
Seba’s family’s maid, who is barely literate, just loves her economic prospects and the fact that maybe three or four generations down the road one of her descendants will finally be able to attend college.
Hint as to why the author thinks Chileans are so happy with the way things are: HE LIVES IN A SANTIAGO WHERE IT SNOWS.
He also says, “I credit the police here for protecting private property and dealing with the violent rioters in a very professional way.”
Right. Plain clothes officers infiltrating the riots to incite violence therefor giving the police an excuse to throw tear gas and use their crazy water machines is “very professional.”
I agree that the media exaggerated accounts of violence — on both sides. In both the U.S. and in Chile from watching the news, you would’ve thought that the entire city had been thrown in complete chaos and darkness, when that was absolutely not the case.
But to to say that really nothing big is happening and that everybody is ladidori happy-go-lucky is absolute bullshit.
The author finishes the piece by saying, “Ultimately, Chile remains a free, respectful, market-oriented, opportunity-rich country on a long-term uptrend, and that hasn’t changed one bit.”
By the way, the man who wrote the article is PhD. who lives in Chile. Chile is definitely opportunity-rich for someone like him. It is for me too. Lucky us, we were both able to get a great education. In the U.S.
The comments to this post are already shaping up to be really interesting. I thought Marmo, in particular made a great point when he said,
“When media say “Chile has a 7% annual growth”, that means almost nothing for you and me, it only means that a few guys that concentrate the wealth here in Chile have had a good year. Those growth % numbers are a big lie. Using the same logic, if two people live in an island, one of them has 1 million dollars and two Mercedez, and the other has nothing, statistics will show for that island that the population has $500.000 and a Mercedes each.”
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If you have a penis you may want to stop reading asap. This post will actually lower your testosterone levels. Fact. UNLESS you are awesome like Seba and Kai. The manliest of men know how to appreciate their wives’ appreciation of shoes.
I have mentioned it a time or nineteen two on my Twitter, but this year I bought a couple pairs of Prada’s. Oh YEAH. Do you like how casually I just mentioned that, like it ain’t no thang?
Well it is a thang. A huge thang, to me. The same way I was huasa about getting to fly in first class, I am total huasa about my Prada’s. Someone cooler than me wouldn’t make this much of a deal about them.
I love fashion. I love that you get up and get dressed and that’s a way to show the world who you are. I love feeling good in my clothes and I pretty strongly believe that there is no such thing as overdressed. I love looking at normal every day clothes and I love looking at the photos of the clothes that walk down the runways of Milan, Paris and NYC even though no mere mortal could ever wear them in regular life. Clothes are fun because they’re both fantasy and reality. They’re reality because they are what you put on every day, but they’re fantasy because you dress like who you want to be, or how you want to be perceived. I hope people look at me in my clothes and think that I’m a no-nonsense, balls to the walls bold, modern woman. I’m not sure why I’m being so phallic with this post. Back to the shoes.
Many many moons ago, when I first started following fashion bloggers and looking up fashion week photos and realizing this whole unfamiliar world was out there, I decided that one day I would celebrate my successful business by buying myself an amazing pair of shoes, regardless of the cost.
At first I set a specific goal — as soon as I booked my first wedding outside of Chile I would buy the shoes.
Then I booked the first one in the U.S. and decided that didn’t count. I needed to book a wedding outside of the U.S. and Chile. We then photographed our first wedding in Buenos Aires. But I told Seba that really, the goal should be to shoot a wedding that wasn’t anywhere in the Americas. Did that too.
So then I started making financial goals. Book a 4k wedding, book a 5k wedding and so on and so on. Hit all those goals. Made goals of how much we needed to save in a year. Hit those goals.
And when I hit those goals, I would go to fancy stores, admire shoes, chicken out of buying them and make new impossible to reach goals. Part of that was because I hadn’t found a pair of shoes that I was truly in love with. But part of that was because I was scared to spend so much money on one small item, especially knowing how judgmental people can be of those who spend money on luxury purchases– especially when said luxury purchase is something as frivolous as designer shoes. Even though I’ve had a couple requests to post about the shoes, I’ve hesitated on doing so for the same reasons.
I can see why people wouldn’t spend their own money on clothes or shoes if they’re not into fashion. But I wouldn’t spend money on a nice car, and I don’t judge those who do. If that’s your thing, that’s your thing. I think organic food is ridiculously expensive and probably won’t make you live any longer than me, lover of pesticides and hormone filled meat, but I’m not sitting up on my high horse looking down on those who choose to spend their money on that.
Sometimes people say, “I love your shoes!” and I respond, “Thanks, they’re Prada,” and I can see a judgment flash across other person’s face. In those instances, I feel the need to explain, “I’m not an extravagant person!” I mean, I have lived with my in-laws in the ghetto for almost two years now so that we could save money instead of renting while we’re remodeling our apartment. Yes, we fly around the world, but we do so in coach, we stay in budget hotels when we’re paying for our own accommodations, we don’t eat fancy dinners every night, we rarely take taxi’s. I’m not saying we’re poor. But we prioritize. And this year, it just so happens that I prioritized Prada shoes. And then I prioritized them again.
I didn’t buy designer shoes because I felt like they were a status symbol. I bought them because I love beautiful things and to me these are so gorgeous that I feel more beautiful just by putting them on my two little footsies. Cinderella and the Prada slippers. Fashion is so cool because in 5 years, the stripes that were so in last season will be out. But in 50 years, this collection will be in a museum and people will be studying what the crazy kids of the 2000′s were wearing.
May I present to you, my favorite shoes in the whole wide world? I saw these online and adored them. But I wasn’t sure how they would look in person, and more importantly, how they would feel. I knew that Seba would probably hire a hit man to hit me HARD if I bought them and then never wore them because they were uncomfortable.
But they weren’t. We went to Saks and I walked around the entire shoe department over and over and over again. I was nervous about buying them. The sales man was really nice and didn’t even try to protest that I probably walked 3 solid miles within the store in them. When he was wrapping them up I said, “This is my first pair of designer shoes, ” and he replied, “Here’s to many more.”
Because they have so many colors I feel like they don’t really match anything — which means that they really match everything.
Umm, hello awkward in front of the camera.
Aren’t they so amazing?
The striped heels absolutely made this shoe magical for me. It’s so unexpected. The deep green doesn’t really go with the rest of the colors, yet it somehow works.
So I got the above shoes towards the beginning of this year, I believe it was. It was terrifying to make that purchase. I was so scared, but once I finally bought them and started wearing them (All. The. Time.) I was obsessed. I loved them so much. They’re comfortable enough that I can really wear them to anything, and they’re crazy enough that I feel like I can wear them with anything. Insta-favorites.
When I had purchased the first pair, the shoes in the photos below were some of the others that I was looking at online. But they didn’t have them in stock to try on in person at the store I went to, so I kind of forgot about them. They’re my First Prada’s second cousins.
They went on sale about a month and a half ago. I stared at them online for about an hour straight debating. Emily told me they looked like Wicket Witch of the West shoes. I told her that was why I liked them.
I checked over the return policy very carefully and then ordered them online, figuring if they didn’t look good in real life, I could always send them back.
But when I saw them for the first time, I feel in love. They’re Dr. Seuss shoes! They simultaneously make me feel grown up wearing them, yet bring me back to my childhood. They’re so much fun, yet not so over the top that I can’t wear them with regular clothes. HEART.
I totally tried to fashion blogger it up with my pose but look, even Papi seems as uncomfortable as I felt.
I have NEVER owned anything even close to this expensive in my life. I have never made such a luxury purchase before. I am happy I did though because when I look down and see my happy toes nestled in their Prada bed it reminds me of how hard I’ve worked, how much I’ve accomplished and how much farther I want to go.
What is the biggest splurge purchase you have ever made?
And which of my shoes do you like the best? I think I like the second pair more and Seba likes the first….we need a tie-breaker vote 
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